Tuesday, March 5, 2019

Conflicts are good !

Conflicts are good!


The world today is not as much worried about the next world war, that could potentially shove humanity towards extinction. It is far more distressed with the fall-outs of the hundreds of geographically dispersed, localised, smaller geo-political and military conflicts and skirmishes. These scuffles are far more complex, heterogeneous, multi-polar and unique where a ‘one-fits-all’ solution doesn’t work. No wonder minds go numb whenever we are informed about the next big conflict that’s brewing in our neighbourhood !
   
Now then, we are not here today to discuss about global conflict mitigation strategies. Let’s leave that bit for the elected governments, their well-oiled battalions and their astute national security advisors.

What about the conflicts in our daily lives? What about the conflicts that exist within the contour of our homes, our societies, our offices? How bad are they? Do they rob us of our efficiencies? Do the simmering struggles lead to burn-outs? Does the organisation’s productivity remain compromised? Is it a reality that they are inevitable and unavoidable? Is it like that throbbing pile in one’s rectal canal that never really goes away completely – there are just good and bad days? So much so that you eventually accept its presence and learn to live with it?

Although, the word ‘conflict’ itself is considered blasphemous, I always felt there’s more to it than what meets our eyes. When we think of the word ‘conflict’, we usually tend to picture shouting contests, uncontrolled rage, frosty stares or nerve-wracking and stressful hostilities at workplace. Have we not made conflict synonymous with disharmony, discord and hostility? Well, not necessarily. Outcome of conflicts are generally expected to be binary, resulting in a classic winner-looser scenario. But there actually are many more dimensions to this that we often conveniently ignore or simply fail to recognise. Conflicts can be both positive and productive.

No denying the fact that conflicts are never easy, but it can also provide well-deserved ammo to growth and change, which is good. Pain is rarely desirable, yet it is pain that can wake us up, can prepare us for eventualities and stimulate us to react to challenging circumstances. Conflict is almost like tea leaves – you never know how strong they are until they are subjected to boiling water !

I remember one of my much celebrated corporate bosses once insisted that some degree of organisational conflict is actually desirable and may not be completely dysfunctional. It sometimes could be indicative of commitment to organisational goals, as individuals get competitive in trying to come up with the best possible solution. That in turn can encourage challenge, heighten the individual stakeholders’ concern and responsiveness towards the issues, and lead to increase in productive effort. This sort of conflict is essential, in absence of which an organisation tends to lose its zing and eventually stagnates !
 
In case of an organisational conflict, results vary, largely depending upon how the individuals involved in it choose to approach it. If approached positively, conflicts can be stimulating and can improve quality of decisions. Conflicts and disagreements many a times lead to lateral thinking and contrarian solutions. They may test positions and personal beliefs but they almost always help foster fresh ideas, approaches and alternatives. Lending firmer push towards goals, conflicts can help sprout creativity and imaginativeness of groups and individuals in an organisation. The raw energy of conflicts, if channeled aptly, has the latent potential of amazing organisational metamorphosis.

While dealing with a conflict, competent and healthy individuals tend to seek more information to achieve resolution and not browbeat each other. Strong disagreements can trigger deeper deliberations and examinations. Pragmatic decisions are often made in presence of empirical data, that may not have been available in absence of a conflict. Though some of the emotions associated with conflicts may be negative in nature, yet it also speaks volumes about involvement and participation. A powerful and engaging argument within an organisation is more often than not better than bland apathy. Individuals may either argue to make up later or agree to disagree with each other ! The idea is to be able to disagree without being ‘disagreeable’.

Conflicts are not only about someone winning at the cost of another. It should rather be about how the organisation or a group or even a cause could benefit. Avoidance can rarely be good and at best serve a temporary purpose. Conscious effort to stay guarded in order to avoid conflict can restrain groups from active participation and may result in frustration. On the other hand, conflicts with the intent of undermining the interest of the other, or even aimed at a personal win at all cost is a template for disaster. A purely win-loss model of conflict raises complacency in ‘winners’ with little incentive to improve. While ‘losers’ tend become captives of their resentment. In such cases, instead of resolution, conflicts tend to gather mass and become stronger, often leading to anxiety and re-surfacing of unresolved conflicts. Conflicts however should be managed, before they degenerate into low grade verbal assaults, that can cause irreparable damage to individual egos and sensitivities.  

Conflict almost always gets a bad rap on the knuckles. We inevitably assume that conflict leads to collapse of a relationship. Many of us avoid conflict like plague, thinking that if we close our eyes to a potential encounter, it wouldn’t exist. But if managed effectively, organisational conflicts can serve as catalyst, rather than as a deterrent, towards organisational growth. The key is to develop a high level of individual and collective trust within the organisation and not take conflicts and assessments made during such exchanges personally. Then it becomes fairly easy to deal with inflated egos and personality clashes and work collectively towards resolution. It is always good to talk more and not less!